When the subject of domestic violence is discussed, most people will assume that it is who has become the victim. Men can also become the victims of domestic violence. It is important to remember that the gender of the victim is not important. It’s the fact that one person in a relationship believes that it is fine to hurt the other person in a relationship that we need to focus upon.
A survey taken by the Centers for Disease Control in 2010 showed that 40% of the victims of severe physical domestic violence are men.
Male Victims of Domestic Violence
Why are men so silent when it comes to domestic violence? It might just be because there is a societal impression that men are supposed to take care of themselves. Men are supposed to be stronger and be able to subdue women. If they are unable to do so and are abused, then it is not uncommon for people to blame the man becoming a victim instead of seeking out just for him.
- 63% of males as opposed to 15% of females had a deadly weapon used against them in a domestic violence incident.
- Only 15% of the domestic violence that is reported to law enforcement officials is against men.
- The number of men who are estimated to be assaulted by an intimate partner every year: 835,000.
- 1 out of every 14 men has been physically assaulted at least once by a current spouse, significant other, or person they have dated.
- 23% of men have reported that they were physically or sexually assaulted by their male intimate partner.
- 7% of men reported a domestic violence incident by a wife or female cohabitant.
- One in seven men age 18+ in the U.S. has been the victim of severe physical violence by an intimate partner in his lifetime.
Men are supposed to be in control. Society says that they are supposed to be the head of their household. In many cases, domestic violence by men is just as overlooked as violence by women. The only problem is that our society tries to help the hidden victims of domestic violence that are women while we explore the men suffered. Many domestic violence shelters only accept women. Many of them don’t even allow boys above the age of 13 to reside there with their families. If we are not willing to open up our eyes and see every victim of domestic violence, then we are encouraging the physical, sexual, and psychological harm that happens to these victims every day.
How Prevalent Is Domestic Violence Against Men?
- 16% of adult men have said that they were raped by a current or former partner.
- 94% of the perpetrators of sexual abuse against boys are men.
- One in every six boys will be sexually abused before the age of 16 if current trends continue.
- In the National Violence against Women Survey, two thirds of the men surveyed in that study stated that they were physically assaulted as a child by at least one adult caretaker.
- One out of five inmates in prison has experienced at least one incident of being pressured into or forced to have sex during their incarceration.
- 86% of adult men who have been physically assaulted were assaulted by another man.
- Men are more likely to be slapped, kicked, or have objects thrown at them during a domestic violence incident.
We have a lot of jokes in our society about what happens to guys prison. The attitude that tends to surround the subject is one of apathy. After all, a convict goes to prison because they’ve done something wrong, right? Joking about abuse in any form or context lessens the gravity of what has actually occurred. No one, no matter what they have chosen to do with their life, deserves to be assaulted. With so many boys becoming victims and so many men being exposed to abuse from an early age, we are creating two problems. We are creating a cycle of abuse in our society where boys grow up to be men who think it’s fine to be a domestic abuser. We are also creating hidden victims because we are shaming men into believing that they should do more to stop domestic violence that happens to them.
Can This Problem Be Stopped?
- Domestic violence by an intimate partner affects more than 12 million people every year.
- Men experience psychological aggression from an intimate partner just as often as women do.
- Between 1994-2010, about 20% of the victims of intimate partner violence were men.
- Up to 10% of men have experienced stalking by a former partner within the last 12 months.
- The percentage of nonfatal violence against men that occurs every year by intimate partners: 3%.
- In the year 2000, 440 men were killed by their intimate partner. Since then, 4% of male murder victims come from domestic violence incidents.
- When an intimate partner has access to firearms, the chances of having a domestic violence incident increases by five times.
- Husband’s account for 19% of all people who were killed by their spouse.
The issue is one of support. When it comes to domestic violence, women have plenty of resources that are available to them if they are willing to take them. Men do not have a similar luxury. If a man is lucky enough to not be blamed for the domestic violence that has happened to him, the only recourse that is usually available to that man is to leave with nothing. The same is true for mothers who have teenage boys and need to leave. Those boys above the age of 13 who are fleeing with their mothers from domestic violence are the true hidden statistic that we need to focus upon. These boys receive zero support in many circumstances. The good news is that we can change all of this by implementing simple changes that allow for supports to be granted to men who become the victims of domestic violence. It might take some time for society to change its point of view, but that doesn’t mean that each community can’t start finding ways to support the male victims of domestic violence right now.