Kelly Williams Brown is an American author known for her book, ‘Adulting.’ Nominated for the Goodreads Choice Awards Best Humor, Brown outlines 468 easy steps to being an adult. Filled with humor, sound advice, and entertainment, here is a look at some of the most memorable Kelly Williams Brown quotes ever recorded.
“A big part of being a well-adjusted person is accepting that you can’t be good at everything.”
“A slightly modified version of the Serenity Prayer: Lord, grant me the serenity to ignore the assholes I cannot avoid; The luck to avoid the ones I can; And the self-awareness not to be one myself.”
“Be the kind of friend that you want to have.”
“Because here is the truth: Most of the world doesn’t give a flying fuck about you.”
“But the fact is people who always have at least a quarter tank of gas and refill the tank as soon as it dips below that line will never run out of gas on a backwoods mountain road and have to be rescued by a kindhearted trucker. Or murdered by a non-kindhearted trucker.”
“Here is what I’m trying to tell you: Adult isn’t a noun, it’s a verb. It’s the act of making correctly those small decisions that fill our day.”
“If it’s making a galloping noise, it’s probably a horse, not a zebra.”
“If we were all our most real and raw selves every moment of the day things would be just awful. The world would be full of man-size toddlers.”
Author/publisher @kevinsampsell and Kelly Williams Brown, author of ADULTING, at an affordable housing benefit Friday pic.twitter.com/DKlUR3x6l8
— Laura Stanfill (@ForestAvePress) April 13, 2014
“If you wouldn’t show or tell your mom, boss, and ex-boyfriend, then don’t put it on Facebook.”
“Intentions are nice, but ultimately intentions don’t really matter because they only exist inside you.”
“It is hard to convince people of this, but oatmeal truly is miraculous. It gives you an amazing amount of energy, like cocaine.”
“It’s not as though the world hates you- it just has no idea who you are.”
“Jellyfish do not respond to reason, they usually don’t respond to kindness, and they will always show up to ruin a fun party if possible.”
“Meaning to send a thank-you note but then not doing it is exactly the same as never thinking to send one – that person is still receiving zero thank you notes.”
“One of the most jolting days of adulthood comes the first time you run out of toilet paper. Toilet paper, up until this point, always just existed. And now it’s a finite resource, constantly in danger of extinction, that must be carefully tracked and monitored, like pandas?”
"Step 6: Stop enjoying things ironically. Just enjoy them…" – #KellyWilliamsBrown#GiftsforGrads #Adulting #MegJay pic.twitter.com/Q46JoAED3h
— BN ABQ West (@BNABQWest) May 12, 2016
“Or you graduate law school with glorious visions of the important work you’ll do for the Southern Poverty Law Center, but find yourself photocopying briefs in Shreveport.”
“Pay attention to natural consequences, then learn to anticipate them.”
“People aren’t good at processing important things when they’re naked.”
“Remember that, for better or for worse, you are in control of your physical self and surroundings.”
“Some people have blond hair. Some people are really good at baseball. Some people find nothing more pleasurable than organizing a drawer full of buttons. Some people are assholes. This is the human spectrum.”
“Sooner or later, you will lock yourself out of your house. It’s just unavoidable.”
“The truth is that I love trashy dance pop and the garments that are its clothing equivalent. You don’t need to make your tastes a self-conscious statement about who you are. Just unapologetically like the things you like.”
“This is the most difficult and important thing to accept if you wish to be a grown-up: You are not a Special Snowflake.”
Portland's own Kelly Williams Brown, author, appearing in today's Sunday New York Times. Crikey! pic.twitter.com/FpEKGjG8KX
— Dana Haynes (@danahaynes) June 23, 2013
“Whatever happens immediately post-graduation, chances are good that it will be at least a little disappointing.”
“When you begin at the beginning, any progress you make is yours.”
“Wise random strangers at bars are modern-day Oracles of Delphi, except drunk and sometimes leaving abruptly when it’s their turn for karaoke.”
“You are already way more of an adult than you think you are. Truly. Be good, be decent, be responsible, be kind. And don’t forget to send thank-you notes.”
“You don’t need to make your tastes a self-conscious statement about who you are. Just unapologetically like the things you like.”
“Your parents, presumably, love you very much and think you are perhaps the most adorable, talented thing ever to prance upon this earth. Your friends agree with them, as do your favorite teachers, as does your significant other. ”
“You’re a grown up, and you get to decide what behaviors affect you for five minutes versus what behaviors change you as a person.”
Kelly Williams Brown discusses the foundation to her book, ‘Adulting.’ From how to transition forward from your college days to interviewing with the proper professional attire, check out Brown’s perspectives in the following video.
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